What's in a name??? Everything! That's what!

I’ve never been too fond of my last name. It’s not horrible, but it’s not zingy or powerful either. It’s just two simple syllables “BLAH blah.” Eh… nothing exciting.

My surname was shortened from something like Leistoczyk generations ago. I’ve always thought that sounded cool in an Eastern-European-enclave-in-a-big-US-city kind of way. But I’m thankful I never had to write it on my underwear or spell it in refrigerator magnets as a kid. And people screwed up my last name enough, so I can’t imagine the blank stares and “uh… never mind”s I would have gotten with Leistoczyk.

Anyway, if I were a rock star I’d have a hip new name for myself. My current name might work in the world of folk music, but I think any musical context is deserving of a kickass name. And so the quest begins...

I love simple yet assertive last names like Church, King, Strong, or Fox. And of course there are the American icon names like Ford, Carnegie, Rockefeller, and Vanderbilt that connote coolness simply because of their association. I really like Forsyth for some reason. I also have an inexplicable fondness for Jewish names with –berg or –stein, and of course anything “von” anything else is cool. Melissa von ____ would certainly make me sound like a formidable baroness or something. (To be honest, I don’t even know what a baroness is, but I’m pretty sure I want to be one when I grow up. And I’m pretty sure they’re all formidable.)

But none of these names is quite... um... me. I’ve considered many cool surname options, and after much thought I have finally come to a decision. My new last name is everything I need – it’s unexpected given my appearance, it’s short and to the point, there’s no possible way to screw it up, yet it’s very common in certain parts.

My new is quite simply…Wu. Wu is the ultimate cool last name. Just think about it – Wu. Melissa Wu. But for me it wouldn’t be just Melissa Wu. Blah BLAH blah BLAAAAH.

I’m thinking like this - Melissa WUUUUUUUUUUUU!!! So that’s what I’m shooting for, Melissa WUUUUUUUUU!!! It's all about the "Woooooo!" sound - what's more enthusiastic and kickass than that?

It might take a little training to get people to pronounce it correctly (the accent is on the WUUUUUUUUU!), but once it catches on I’ll be the coolest girl in town.

Think about it:

“WUUUUUUUUU!!!, party of two hundred? Table for WUUUUUUUUU!!! is ready.”
“And this year’s winner of the Oreo eating contest is…..Melissa WUUUUUUUUU!!!”
“Excuse me Ms. WUUUUUUUUU!!, but you are HOTTT. Are those real???”

Oh I can hear it already!! So that’s it, it’s official. No more Melissa BLAH blah. Say hello to Melissa Wu. Ahem… I mean…

Melissa WUUUUUUUUU!!!